one day i'm going to change the world. call me optimistic. but really i just like proving people wrong.
i feel like i've been treating this journal like shit. basically barley updating, or commenting on anyone elses entries. i almost want to get a new one. That way i'll feel more inclined. but frankly, i'm just sick of re-explaining myself. so i might stick with this one, i might not. i'm not sure. i would need a really clever name to change it.
so much has happened it's ridiculous. i got a ticket for speeding. booo. i don't even really speed. latley ive been going the speed limit. but i was driving back from highland with stephanie and sam and the song, "wow i can get sexual too" came on and i got a little into it and wasn't paying attention to how fast i was going. needless to say i got a ticket. but whatever. first ticket so i don't care.
Brian is an asshole and the only reason i'm still talking to him is because he's emotionally unstable and i'm afraid he's going to do something absolutley retarted. Him and Ashley are in this huge fight and he had the nerve to get mad at me because this entire week and last week me, her, and vanessa have been hanging out without him. When she left for Italy for five weeks today.
Speaking of which, since ashley left for five weeks now it's just me and vanessa. which you think totally wouldn't be wierd considering the three of us are best friends. but i was thinking about it, and the last time that me and vanessa hung out without anyone else there was definetley like, i don't think ever. which is extremley wierd since we've been friends since 6th grade. but there's always been someone else there. and me her and vanessa became best friends senior year of highschool through a list we made of the things we had to get done before graduating... but it was always the three of us. i've hung out with ashley alone more than like fifty times. but not vanessa. and tonight we hung out just the two of us. and it really wasn't wierd at all. but it was wierd thinking about it. she picked me up and we went to Diamond Jim's and played pool for an hour. then we went to the Diner and atee food. and then i came home. But i was sitting trying to figure out why it was that we've never hung out alone before and why theres always been someone else there. even though she's the copper to my todd <33 the fox and the hound . we watched it two nights ago.
Me and Matt went to meet up for breakfast the other day at the Diner in Nanuet to just get back on track with one another and catch up. He's the youth leader at the church i used to go to until i was like sixteen. He was never actually my youth leader, as he came after my family stopped going to that one, and me and him have only met a handfull of times. but regardless it was nice. i probably talked about my old obsession with Amy Lee from Evanescence for like 20 mintues about the first time i saw her in person and couldn't even speak.. good times. He asked me if i wanted to do audio for a show the church is putting on including all these bands that are pretty popular in the christian music scene. i accepted, cause i really like playing with sound boards and meeting people in bandss.
I started filming my documentary again. i'm telling you right now, it's going to turn out amazing. and i've only interviewd three people. <3
so i guess this is what it feels like to grow up.